Chick Tract: The Gay Blade

In honor of the recent victory for gay rights in California, and in extreme consternation that people like this still exist, I am going to eviscerate another Chick tract. Today’s victim is The Gay Blade.

How is this Chick tract royally fucked up? Let me count the ways…

1. The proper response to “Wilt thou…” is “I will”, not “I do”. No self-respecting educated gay couple would make this mistake.

2. Groom #1 had better watch out, the Reverend looks like he’s about to suck out his soul or something.

3. “Gay militants”? Please. These are only people who are standing up for what they deserve. They have a right to be “militant” about it.

4. The Greek letter lambda can symbolize “unity”, but there are several other possible meanings. The symbol’s definitive original meaning is not known.

• It can stand for “liberation”.
• It can mean “the light of knowledge shining into the darkness of ignorance”.
• There are also a few interpretations relating to the fact that lambda is used to symbolize “energy” in chemistry and physics equations. It can mean the energy of the gay movement, or the synergy of gays and lesbians working together.
• Or, it can represent an unbalanced scales of justice.

(Source)

5. There is no Satan to have a “shadowy world”.

6. The only reason some gay people have such “tragic lives” is because some straight people insist on oppressing them.

7. At this point I should point out that this tract was written in 1984. Gays all over the sitcoms and talk shows? I don’t think so.

8. I, for one, don’t remember ever having a gay speaker at my church or school (in Illinois, in the ’90s).

9. “Their cry is for equal rights.” — Well, at least he got that part right.

10. “Militants boast that homosexuality is normal, healthy, even a desirable form of sexual outlet.” — That’s because it is. And again with the “militants”. And they’re even “boasting” this time.

11. Gay people always have occupied all kinds of jobs, but it wasn’t true in 1984 and it still isn’t true now that they no longer need to “hide their identity”. Unfortunately, many gay people still don’t feel safe coming “out of the closet”.

12. According to Wikipedia, surveys place the gay percentage of the population anywhere from 1% to 10%, with the “accepted figure” splitting the difference at around 5%. Alfred Kinsey famously concluded that nearly all humans are at least a little bisexual — placing neither completely straight nor completely gay on the Kinsey scale. Ultimately, the proportion of gay people that a given study will report depends how the study defines “sexual activity”, homosexuality, bisexuality, or homosexuality, how the survey respondents define these terms, and whether gay or bi respondents feel comfortable answering honestly, among other factors. The bottom line is, they’re here, they’re queer, get used to it.

13. “Has such a condition ever existed before?” — Homosexuality and bisexuality have existed in all cultures throughout our history. They are a natural part of the human condition. What a ridiculous question.

14. Gezer (not Gezor) was a city in ancient Israel that was rediscovered in 1871 and excavated in the early 1900s. I couldn’t find any information about any untoward activities being discovered there, although keltic63 in this thread says s/he found some information about cultic practices which included worship of Baal and Astarte and child sacrifice, none of which is really unique or unusual for an ancient culture, and none of which even relates to homosexuality. Chick is really grasping at straws here.

15. And now comes the requisite Bible lesson, the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. I’ve heard it argued before that this passage doesn’t necessarily imply that the Sodomites were homosexual and intending to rape Lot’s guest, because the verb “to know” used here is a different one from the one usually used as a euphemism for sex. The passage may literally mean that the Sodomites only wanted to see who Lot’s guest was. However, this interpretation is less credible when you consider that Lot responds by offering to let them gang-rape his two daughters instead. (Ah, Biblical family values!) The Wikipedia article on the subject says that according to the Jewish interpretation of this passage, the Sodomites’ major crime wasn’t homosexuality, but that they were just plain horrible people, inhospitable to strangers and outright xenophobic, which makes a literal interpretation of the story more credible again — Lot’s guest was a stranger and the Sodomites wanted to see who he was. Given what we know about the Bible and how it’s been tampered with by its various translations and interpretations over the centuries, I think it’s quite likely that Christians have read what they wanted to into the passage, and then edited it accordingly.

At any rate, none of this religious conjecture has any bearing on whether gay people should have rights in today’s society, because America is not a theocracy.

16. Only in Chick’s alternate reality could gays’ efforts to combat discrimination and bigotry and get equal rights be characterized as “taking the offensive”. They are fighting back against those elements of straight society that have treated them unfairly.

17. Puh-leeze, as if there are hordes of people roaming the streets harassing people for being homophobic. Not now, and certainly not in 1984.

18. Silly Chick, there are no demonic powers to control anyone.

19. Christians usually cite Leviticus 18:22 to condemn homosexuality in general, but that verse actually doesn’t say anything about lesbians. They’re not “lying with mankind” at all.

20. In 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, the words in parentheses were added by Chick. Equating “effeminate” with “homosexual” is quite a stretch. Bizarrely, Chick cuts out the part of the verse that can be construed to refer to homosexuality, “nor abusers of themselves with mankind”, although I’ve usually heard “self-abuse” as a euphemism for masturbation, so you could argue that this passage is only condemning circle-jerks. Otherwise, see #15.

21. And, of course, 1 Corinthians 6 doesn’t mention lesbians either.

22. Hey, how come no lesbians have ever tried to make me gay?

23. Is it just me or does the artwork in this panel remind anyone of the girls in Leisure Suit Larry games?

I wish I could insinuate that Chick must have been inspired by them, but this tract predates the earliest Larry game by three years. (Oh, good Lord — maybe Al Lowe was inspired by Jack Chick?! )

24. A former pastor at my old church argued once that Romans 1 doesn’t actually condemn homosexuality, it condemns acting against one’s own nature — that is, straight people having gay sex, or gay people having straight sex.

25. Chick’s figure about gay men’s life expectancy being “only 42 years” comes from one extremely questionable study that gets referenced by homophobes ad nauseam. It’s patently ridiculous.

26. Yeah, people in 1984 were openly congratulating people on the street for being gay. Chick needs to get real.

27. “Because the Bible says so” is a bald-faced argument from authority. The Bible is just a book.

28. Don’t even get me started on the whole Jesus thing.

Well, I’ve had about enough… until the next time I’m suffering from a bout of masochism.

Tags: Atheism, Gays and Lesbians, Jack Chick, Stupid

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