This season, the best dressed babies are wearing lead

Toys ‘R’ Us has gotten on board with the lead trend for children. But, not content to just sell a poison-painted doll like all the other child trend-watchers, Toys ‘R’ Us has something different — something edgy!

Here we see the absolute latest in baby haute couture: lead-laced bibs! What better place to wear your lead than a surface that comes in contact with your food? It’s old-school (pewter was once all the rage for plates and goblets!) but, yet, so new! So inventive!

And this is only the beginning! I predict that next season we’ll start seeing more lead-laced clothing. A good case of lead poisoning is so great for getting that fashionable sickly pallor, isn’t it? Just be sure to get the right color to complement your baby’s skin tone. Check the inside of your baby’s wrist. If it turns more green than yellow, dress her in warm tones to make her coloring really “pop”. If your baby is just ghostly pale, put her in cool tones and winter whites to really wash her out! Lead-laced baby dishware will also be popular, of course. Be sure to get the coolest cartoon character designs before they run out!

Tags: News